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love in perranuthnoe 1. Your husband's step sister is a twat. Barring a apology, hell would freeze over before I ever even acknowledged her existence much less invited her to anything again. 2. Where the F was your husband in all of this? The issue was with his family; he should have dealt with it. 3. The whole spiel regarding the dog being a service dog is irrelevant. A wedding is a private event, where anti-discrimination laws are wholly inapplicable. You can refuse admittance to anyone for any damn reason you please. 4. I understand your hesitancy to turn the whole thing into a issue. Where family is concerned you sometimes have to swallow your misgivings, grin, and bear it. This isn't one of those times. The insufferable twat not only completely disregarded your wishes regarding YOUR wedding she actually invoked (albeit incorrectly) the LAW in doing so. If there's a bigger "F You" possible on this mortal plane, I've yet to hear of it. As as she pulled that crap, you should have gone nuclear on her and rescinded her invitation altogether. Then you should have told your husband-to-be that either you would be at the wedding or the twat would be at the wedding, but not both of you. 5. Peace through strength. If you want to avoid drama with your husband's side of the family, then you need to command their respect. Trying to get along is one thing. Completely subordinating your wishes to their whims is quite another. You're in the right, so show some backbone and take a stand where the twat is concerned. A little discomfort now can avert a ton of discomfort down the road. As things stand, you are harboring negative feelings toward her, and say that you probably continue to do so. So her out on her bullshit, and give her a to either a) come to, or b) defend her claim to "ultimate twat," in which case you can wash your hands of her with a clean conscience. You're welcome.
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